Steamy soup ...

It's a doozy day today. The last thing I am up for today is writing. I hate to admit it, but it's true. I'm not up for much other than a warm cozy blanket and some refuge. Some days trickle in like this but I have yet to get used to them. So I curl up and I imagine that someone with a warm smile is bringing me steamy soup, caressing my cheek, moving my hair from my face and gently tucking it behind my ear, opening the window to let in a soft breeze and reminding me that these murky moments pass. Sometimes we don't always have said warm someone around at exactly the moment we need them. So, we must do it for ourselves. Off I go, to put on my tiny smile, caress and tuck, to open a window and let in a soft breeze and to have this steamy soup.

For those sometimes murky moments, something easy, beautiful and heartwarming.

Give yourself a hug. And open a window. It does wonders.

Time to dish.

Steamy squash soup with cream, thyme and toasted almonds

Here is what you need:

• One lovely squash. Butternut or pumpkin will do. All cut up into one inch cubes.
• One head of garlic. Bulbs out but skin on.
• One large onion cut into one inch cubes.
• Glug of olive oil.
• A little over a cup of thick organic cream at room temperature
• Thyme sprigs.
• Toasted sliced almonds.
• Cracked pepper.
• Crusty bread.
• A hot cup of tea.

Here is what to do:

1. Preheat the oven, 400 will do. Combine your quash, onion, garlic and thyme in your pan and drizzle with olive oil and roast until sweet, tender and caramelized, about 20 minutes. Then take out the thyme sprigs and pop out the garlic heads from their skins and transfer the roasted veggies to a blender with your cream. Blend until smooth. That's it kids. Put it in your best bowl and serve hot with the almonds, pepper and crusty bread.
2. Also have a hot cup of tea to go with.
3. Then get under the covers and have a snooze. Zzzzzz.....

So I thought about it a little ...

Something strange happens to me every spring dear readers. A feeling overcomes me. It is the first year I have been able to figure out what is going on even though it has been happening to me for many years now. I guess I can say that it's because it is the first year that I am really paying attention. Though, I've always felt I've paid attention... A funny thing, that is ...

Every spring, I feel anxiety. A fear comes over me. A certain ... uneasiness. My stomach turns, I feel slightly dizzy... I know, it's weird right? That's what I thought too. And it's only this year that I have been able to give the feeling a name. I found it very odd. And it just kind of crept upon me, as these things tend to do. There I was siting in the sun, feeling its welcome heat on my face, lounging about and wiggling my happy, free toes, enjoying a beautiful salad with Napa lazily lounging beside me keeping one eye on an ant and one eye on her squirrel arch nemesis, and what was I feeling? Slightly uneasy. A little more than slightly, if truth be told. I couldn't believe it. 

So I thought about it a little... 

I thought and thought, gave Napa a pet and thought some more and then it hit me, as these things tend to do. It all made sense. I was the recipient of a big, old fashioned, sensory, wallop. For me, after the great hibernation of winter - where everything slows down, the sun traveling low in the sky, the light caressing soft and low, me snuggled under countless blankets with countless hot teas and tons of fatty food and the bareness and the urban sounds somewhat muffled by blankets of snow -  the sheer aliveness of spring is totally shocking. It freaks me out people. Destabilizes me. Makes me go whoa.

In spring the skies blaze and light glimmers, people swarm the streets, dust kept in check by winter's soft blanket of snow now swirls and blows all around, the smell of soil - moist and supple - permeates the air and invades your nostrils, seeds that have been waiting, dormant, literally burst out and through the dense cover of earth, birds fly back home by the hundreds in large communal v's, bugs are back buzzing and scuttling about in abundance. All at once. Everything living, breathing, bursting, moving, transforming, growing, changing, needing to be cleaned... It totally wallops me. Knocks my senses about for a bit and, makes me anxious. And another thing, one thing that I had not noticed before, is that for a little while, the moon leaves us. There is a time when it is only visible during the day here, alongside the sun, and I realize I miss the moon and her light at night... 

So that's it. All the stuff you just read. Makes me anxious. Makes me appreciate every moment. Fills me with awe.

You know, sometimes I wish I could just sit and eat a salad. You remember the salad I was eating when all this hit? I guess sometimes I can. Just not this time.

Happy Spring dear readers. And happy whatever it is that you celebrate this weekend. Enjoy it, and enjoy one another. One love.